Anywhere in the Central Valley. LOL
It seems as though Mother Nature is telling us it is officially time to hibernate. As wonderful an idea as that may be, it is certainly not practical. I like the cold, being bundled up, snuggling on the couch watching college football games, but I do need a bit of sun to thrive, to be productive.
Had a discussion with someone the other day about being "thin skinned". So what do all 2 of my blog readers think....
do we:
a) grow "thicker" skin as we age
or
b) grow "thicker" skin as we experience life?
The other question would be, why if it grows thicker as we experience life, do certain spots seem to remain "thin" for so long? Is this something we can change ourselves? Is it a mind over matter or good Karma kinda situation?
Do you realize your skin has thickened the minute someone doesn't effect you as it would have in the past? Does it take a few seconds, minutes, hours, days, months, years? When do you know?
I feel as though we know when we can shrug off the bad, and keep focusing on the good, on the things that rock, the adventures that we dare to take, the hugs we give, the love we show, the smiles we share, the listening ears and shoulders we lend, and the laughs the rock the world.
8 comments:
i find it amusing when i realize that something about someone no longer bothers me the way it did, but that at the same time something else about that person suddenly drives me up the wall.
kind of a status quo.
but don't you think that with maturity and experience comes the ability to not be ruffled by others' petty bullshit? or that maturity and experience allow you to not be pettily ruffled?
when poverty and disease no longer bother you then, yes, your therapist needs another retainer check. when you can tolerate a friend chewing with their mouth open from 5 feet away, then maybe you've evolved in a good way (though i sure as hell haven't).
My think skin is most effected by things that happen with people i put love and trust in.
It's like that comfy cozy feeling of having a bond and trust thing, and then I am really hurt when something crappy happens.
I guess I need to have a steel trap around my heart???
no steel trap needed. maybe just a taser and gps tags. as for the think skin...strip it, stuff it and send it in to that reggae psychic.
Dear Poodle Skirt Queen...
Down deep, the issue really amounts to a simple question..is it me or is it them? Am I what they say, or are they what I think they are for saying that?
There is an old Zen story, a koan, about how everyone's life is like a piece of string. With time and experience it grows longer. However,we are all also issued a pair of scissors.
The story goes on to say that some people focus on making the string longer, while others spend their time cutting other peoples string. The worst og us oscillate between cutting your string, and then their own.
What, you might ask (or, knowing me you might refrain and simply ask for another drink) does that have to do with skin thickness?
It is meant to make us contemplate upon where our focus is. Are we so focused on what others think, whether they approve, and do they like/love me, that we fail to experience life as it is happening, and allow ourselves to be manipulated by these people (damn..now I need a drink). Or, do we come to terms with the generally sloppiness of life, the overall haphazard way things are organized, such that we realize that on the whole we are a realitively good person.
My experiences is that the really bad, sad, and generally unpleasant types are merely unable to focus upon where they are, who they are and enjoy the ride. So they pick up their scissors, and tear into those around them.
Thick skinned, I think, means I love myself enough to love those people enough to tolerate their arrogance, stupidity, ignorance, spite, hate, and general naughtiness. I once wrote that their are some people I will be nice to, but they are not my friends. Part of being thick skinned is being able to be nice to not-nice people.
Thin skinned is knocking the living shit out of the effing asshole who just hit his girlfriend because she complained a bit about being tired. He hit her once. But never again.
Movie Quote Rule 27 "Always be nice, until it is time to not be nice"
So, yes it hurts, alot damn it. But we are all human. We say and do stupid stuff, mostly to each other. Especially to those we love and care about. Thick skinned is caring enough about them to let them be an asshole on occasion. Just remind them that it is a privilage, and not a right.
Sunday, 03DEC, 0900-ish on the patio. Coffee, exiting music, intereting chow. Bring whats his species with you.
I guess all us geezers are chiming in on this one.
I don't think I feel any less now than when I was younger. I just feel different. The older I get the choice of battles (and if I even want to engage in) becomes less. I have also learned that very little is "all important" in the big scheme of things and helps with the awareness that it just isn't worth getting my knickers in a tizzy over anything that is targeted at my ego.
Came by to also wish you and yours Cheers and a very Happy Thanksgiving!
I'm chiming in to say "Yeah, what they (Mustang and Lecram) said!"
and to add; Don't be afraid of your feelings or deny the gift they are to you as they are your inner compass. Your feelings help you to pay attention to the connection to yourself and your connection to others. They (the feelings) are helping you to learn about what you really "need" to live your life and be true to yourself.
Hugs and happy Thanksgiving to you and yours.
hmmm....first off: ain't it interesting that you're so good at lots of stuff, and math ain't one of em!?!?!?!? Holy cow!! S--O-O-O-O-O much more than 2 blog readers.....
:)
For me, I can't believe how thin some of my spots are, how incredibly tough and thick others are----and the distance between the two spots is only a micronanometer.
uh-huh, there I go -- making up words and stuff. Ha! Good thing I'm not an English teach--
oops...
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